This is more than me than for you. I write sometimes to get my house in order. To brighten the corners and sweep out the cobwebs, line things up neatly and try to understand.
I spend most of my working life trying to understand people far away doing extraordinary and ordinary things and to translate that into a medium to share. For the moment I need to understand what I think I might be doing. You’re welcome along for this ride of course.
I spent the last week mostly in bed. I am rarely ill. Or at least rarely so ill that I cannot work. It’s been strange, introspective, frustrating – about what you might expect. Nothing special and everyone gets it sometime.
It did mean that I had an enforced lull. There was not much I could do but dream and think. I get concerned in these moments that I’ll just crawl so far into my own navel that the light of day will be a memory. I like to be busy, it keeps me away from myself.
This lull happened before a few instances of change. My work will change, from a more academic field of future gazing and experimentation that I am proud of and grateful for the opportunity. I’ll return to the bustle and hum of the newsroom. It feels a little bit like going home, I’ve almost always worked in a newsroom.
I have a new flatmate. Getting used to someone new is nice. The change over is strange. In watching a friend leave to a better set up and clear his life down, I too found myself more willing to strip back my life a little. Streamline and return. Getting to know someone new of course means also learning something new about yourself. The stories change, not completely, but the perspective is different and somewhat surprising.
Soon also I will finish the first year of my degree in Computer Science and Human Machine interaction. There have been times when I thought I might fail, not the knowledge but the dedication. Having come this far, I want the qualification enough to spur me into another year. It will be tricky to balance the day job and the radio show and study again. It’s a bit anti-social. But the thrill of learning is something I enjoy. It’s having something new but a more valuable tool than something new from a shop.
Travel is back on the agenda. An event I have been waiting for, for a long time. It’s costing me dearly. I have the sort of parents who teach me measured irresponsibility. I am impossibly grateful to them for this ideal. I don’t think you “get to take it with you”either. So I had better enjoy as much of it now as I can get my hands on.
Their advice will also take me to Kathmandu, Nepal soon after. To see an old friend in a new place. I love the desert but I am from the mountains, so I hope to feel rather at home in such a hilly place.
So, there’s code in my head and my passport is trembling with anticipation again. It feels like the eye of the storm but the planning was work and the exit will be the payoff.
There’s more. There’s always more. This seems like a lot when all the little tasks worm their way out to be dealt with. But already, I can sort of see a clearing. So it must be almost time to start planning the next fine mess I can get myself into…
…and yes, I moved the furniture around on my blog and sorted my sock drawer.
Maybe it’s just Springtime afterall.